Dunluce castle in Northern Ireland lies high above the sea, at the edge of a rock, now ruined
Just as we use a different vernacular with our professors, “I’d like to argue that a Post-Structuralist reading of Shakespeare’s The Tempest encourages the reader to see the island as a simulacrum,” and our friends, “Oh girl, I totes had the best hun-cal fro-yo today,” our culture too, defines what kind of language we use. With some, the tone is naturally warm and welcoming, and with others critical and sarcastic. Not only can tone differ but the frankness of speech and the structure of the language can be different as well. While these differences make all of our cultures unique, the different ways people communicate still remain quite curious to strangers.
A friend of mine, Tanya Woodard, went to Malaysia a few years ago and wondered about the word “sure” as a response to a direct yes/no question. She began to discover that their culture was quick to say “no.” Therefore a “sure” always meant “yes.” Tanya thought that it was due to their laid back culture, where ours is assertively “yes” or “no” in a quick-moving country. Cambodians share this peculiarity. When helping out a community church in Cambodia, my working partner and I constantly asked the pastor for the day plans. He’d respond with phrases such as, “Perhap you have a break now” or “Perhap we visit the farm now” or “Perhap we teach English now.” We eventually learned that “perhap” was not “perhaps” or “maybe”; it was “definitely.”
Another thing that Malays and Indonesians have in common is their truthfulness. Though never meant for rudeness, to an outsider, their speech may come as a surprise. Things that Americans would consider opinions, Southeast Asians would consider fact. I got to spend some time with two college girls in Cambodia who volunteered at the church. When first getting to know them through their broken English, one of them said, “You’re fat. We’re thin, and you’re fat.” To be fair, I was quite a bit larger than they were, as the women in Asia are naturally stick thin. However, I was not fat! I tried not to take offense and just laughed at their forwardness. To them, they weren’t being rude, just making small talk.
The Chinese style of speech is very colorful. My friend Walter Wilson told me this is because there are many different ways to say each word. Let me tell you trying to think about that concept as an American is terribly confusing. Their tone is very abrupt, sharp, and angry-sounding. Walter said, “A normal conversation may sound like an argument if you don’t know better.” Imagine actually getting into a fight and what that would sound like!
Russians are also known to be a bit harsh in how they speak. One of my dear friends Amy Kozlarek grew up in Russia and told me that the language communicates no warmth at all. She says, “It’s full of harsh consonants and is often spoken with a degree of forcefulness that English-speakers aren’t naturally used to. But in reality, the harshness is intensified by the fact that, if you don’t KNOW the Russian with whom you’re speaking, he or she will rarely communicate friendliness or openness with you.” In places like that I wonder how you would make a friend if you were a stranger. But again, that simply points to cultural differences, not anything about the kindness of the people once you get to know them.
The Northern Irish also use a bit of a harsher tone than us Americans. Their speech is laced with sarcasm and dry jokes. They are blunt, straight-forward, and not very externally warm. They are extremely unreceptive and awkward when receiving verbal compliments. Oh how I love the Northern Irish! Their language is completely opposite from how I speak. It took me a little while to realize that they’re not super rude, they’re just vocal binary oppositions.
Another friend of mine Kate Young, just returned from a semester abroad in London studying English. She found that the English English is “very soothing and easy on the ear.” She felt it made sense due to the non-confrontational nature of the English and their polite, quiet demeanors. Who wouldn’t want to spend a semester with such fine accents and soft speech?
I can’t quite tell which I like the best. Guess I’ll just have to travel to some more countries and see for myself, but I have a feeling it would take me just a little bit to get used to the tone of the Russians. Oy vay!
