If you have noticed a weird, whiny whimpering becoming louder over the last few days—don’t be alarmed. It is simply the sound of students despairing, because they did not realize quite how atrocious their resumes were until the most recent job fair.
When it comes to likeliness of job placement after college there is only one type of student that stands a chance: The fabled Resume Hunter. We all have either heard of them, know of one, or are one. Resume Hunters go around UW, signing on for whatever classes, labs, club commitments, etc. can fill their resumes with paragraphs upon paragraphs of fancy titles.
To all hunters out there: keep doing your thing and enjoy having a job after you are finished with the degree factory. To those of you making fun of “uber-involved” classmates: Stop laughing now and become very somber. Realize that if you both went up for the same position, the crazy caffeinated super student will be chosen over you 99 percent of the time.
Sure, it’s easy to complain that with the economic shift in the last decade, our millennial generation is getting screwed. Instead of having a job after college, we are more likely to bum around on our parents’ couch until we finally find something. Internships have become more competitive and completely unpaid. Oh and then there is this idea that we should always follow our dreams. I am not opposed to the concept, but too many people mistake that mantra to mean that we all deserve our dream the minute we think of it.
Unless you won the ovarian lottery and were born into a rich family, that will not happen to you. Let me repeat that. You will never achieve your dream simply by wanting it. Resume Hunters have realized that employers pick their employees based on statistics, much like they would a quarterback in fantasy football. Employers do not care if someone is personable until after that someone survived the spreadsheet comparison to every other candidate out there.
My advice is that if you have not started the resume hunt, do so now. Find on-campus opportunities to gain experience or fancy titles, at the very least. Apply to every internship opportunity, paid or unpaid, and do the dirty work. Not only will your resume tell your prospective employer that you gained experience in the field of work, but also that you were willing to work some unfavorable jobs to get to where you want to be. This is important, since you are not only competing against every other graduate interested in a particular job, but also your perspective employer’s perception that our generation is entitled and lazy.
With that in mind, stop the whining and start looking for these opportunities. Happy Hunting.
